Thursday, March 18, 2010

Hottest Compare/Contrasts in Metal

On the left is Halestorm who don't play Metal. However, the do play middle-of-the road/file next to Lita Ford/Headpins/Alaniya Miles drunk soccer mama rock The type Middle America loves it kinda just average at best, wallpaper-y loudish rock. While It’s not quite in the completely dreckful Papa Roach/Nickelback/Limp Bizkit spectrum. However, seeing all the usual promotional garbage attached in many ways makes them “just another we wanna make it big” band.

Their ad-laden myspace page carries the usual “we endorse/get get free shit from” variety (i.e. Gibson, Pro-Mark sticks, SIT strings) along with the nothing-actually-to-do with music of Monster Energy Drink and Vitamin Water. Oddly, within this Vitamin Water ad is a sponsored ad for yet another ad for: “The Music Fashion Project” where a be-fauxhawked” male model is er, hawking a generic ‘tribal tattoo’ -looking $33 (“normally $49" !?!) longsleeve shirt. The shirts are made by a company called "Teastain". Oddly, teastain’s site says nothing about “Charity’ and everything about:

“Unsatisfied with loud designs and over-the-top clothing, we took a stand. We decided to provide an alternative to the frenzied designs dominating the marketplace."


"...People should have a stylish alternative to the $90 t-shirt. Clothing should not distract from what is most important... the person wearing it. Thus, Tea Stain Clothing was born. Always remember, you are the most important part of your wardrobe!”

Hence an “alternative” to the “cutting edge(?)” of Ed Hardy/Affliction/Famous. The only link to a charity is on the widget’s far right corner which is for New Orleans Musicians Clinic. Obviously this is far more to do with pimping clothes than supporting chararties. It’s about as representative of this charity as Bounce Fabric Softer is for breast cancer. In short, you might as well say “welcome to the world of major labels”.


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